today is one of those days i just dont want to leave the bed, between my back sore and stiff and my chest hurting from strong coughs i am just worn out. working nights i have the weirdest night time activities, i was watching youtube videos, playing video games, outside smoking cause i have no choice and i see random people coming from the train and walking i wonder what they are coming from. sometimes i make monolouges for them, stupid shit that makes me giggle and then back inside to being alone in the dark, just me and my black cat my baby and mixed drink.
i've definitely become a loner and i find nothing wrong with it, sometimes yes; sometimes i get so fucking lonely i get depressed and find myself crying while sleeping but like a true soilder i deal with it. i take my emptiness and carry on.
still haven't heard from my best friend, i wonder what's happening with her life but part of me knows that it has nothing to do with me. man scratch that, nothing about her life has ANYTHING to do with me.
i think i should just head back into the bed and chill until night fall. only have laundry do, ive avoided it for too long anyway so now i got no other choice to do it. hate laundry day.
